The Sorcerer's Apprentice

Yeah, I know I said I was going to write a piece on the Joan River's documentary but turns out the showtime OnDemand stopped after Friday. And since my friend who was suppose to come out and visit me can't come now, I'll be hitting you up with two blog posts for the two DVDs I rented.

And to kick off my mini-movie-marathon, I'm starting with The Sorcerer's Apprentice. To be honest, I expect that this is a movie where the funny stuff was in the trailer. And you're probably wondering why I rented it if I knew this. It's because of Jay Baruchel. I've seen his work before and I just find him endearingly awkward. Which makes the dollar spent on renting the movie worth it.

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We open with a little flashback to the past. Merlin has 3 apprentices, one of which has betrayed him [Maxim Horvath]. He is fighting with his most deadly enemy, Morgana la Fay, when he finds out of this. Merlin is dealt a deadly blow and is dying. Basically, Veronica Gorloisen [one of the good apprentices] stops Morgana from killing Balthazar Blake [the other good apprentice whose last name just seems so out of place for the time] by trapping Morgana's soul in her own body. Which, naturally doesn't bode well for Veronica. In order to stop Morgana from killing Veronica from the inside out, Balthazar traps them in what they call Grimhold [it looks kind of like those little Russian dolls that's a doll in a doll in a doll in a doll... Think Inception with a dream in a dream in a dream in a dream].

As Merlin is dying, he gives Balthazar a cool little dragon statue that is suppose to basically find the chosen one [Dunno if this means Merlin's reincarnation or just the kid who gets his powers]. And so Balthazar journeys for years trying to find the Chosen One [reminiscent of Harry Potter... Just I like Jay better than Daniel Radcliffe]. Oh, and the Chosen One in the movie is called the Prime Merlinian [which made me think Prime Meridian... But apparently they are not the same].

And we jump over to a little boy and his dog. Who tend proceeds to go on a class field trip. While on the bus, said little boy [David is his name we find out] is vandalizing doodling on a window, which a girl in his class [that he apparently likes] admires. Later, he sends her a note asking if she wants to be his friend or his girlfriend. Unfortunately, the wind blows the note away before it can get back to him and he can find out her answer. He chases after it, finally ending up in a shady store... Own by none other than Balthazar! And the little dragon statue likes David so much, her turns into a ring.

Balthazar tells David not to touch anything while he goes to get him his own incantis or whatever. Naturally, David is a stupid little 10 year old boy and happens upon Grimhold and opens it up, letting Maxim Horvath out. An all out battle of magic ensues between Horvath and Balthazar over the doll [Horvath gets to fight from a distance which is way not fair]. Eventually, they get sucked into an urn. David runs out of the shop, throws the Grimhold and tells his teacher about the craziness that happened in the shop. Naturally, when they go in, it looks as if nothing has been touched. He's crazy and humiliated [especially because his pants had gotten drenched during the fight making it look like he wet himself]. All the kids are laughing, including the girl he had sent the note to in the beginning.

Flash forward some more and we're up 10 years since the incident. David is in college, living in an apartment with a friend. And it's his birthday! We learn he's a physics major and it seems to rule a bunch of his life. We also get a glimpse of the awesome dragon ring statue... in his sock draw. -insert rolling eyes here- His roommate and friend lectures him on finding a mate [Their words, not mine].

He wanders off to lecture at some class... And he runs into love of his life girl from 10 years ago [turns out her name is Becky and I'm not really paying attention to her]! Turns out he transferred schools not to long after that incident... 4th graders are the absolute worse. I still don't know how the heck her recognized her after 10 bloody years. They barely look like their younger selves... Just sayin'.

And the movie wanders off to some person's apartment for a bit where the urn is... And it's shaking!

Back to David, he is basically kind of stalking Becky. She does stuff at a local radio show or whatever. However, during a lightning storm, it hits the antenna [pretty sure nothing works via antenna now] and he manages to make it work again. And he leaves! Without getting her number or anything! And even his roommate points out that he's stupid. David turns on the radio to Becky's station as he's working on his big project thing. -insert lots of cool special affects and lightning bolt things making sounds-

We flash to the urn again and the man and his wife who own it are all sorts of freaked out [I would be too]. Eventually, Maxim Horvath bursts forth because apparently, there was only a 10 year sentence on the damn thing. He tosses the urn out of the window in the hopes that Balthazar, who is supposedly still inside, will just go kaput with it. Of course, that's never the case.

Horvath talks from the side that it was the only thing he had to read for the past 10 years. And that the grade was well deserved. Either way, our freaked out college student makes a run for it after Horvath demands for the Grimhold. Dave is then chased by wolves that Horvath summoned via calendar [the one shown to use with the mate speech].

But thankfully, Balthazar saves the day and Dave. By turning the wolves into adorable puppies. <3 Love it. They are so adorable and I want one! Dave and Balthazar fly away on a giant metal owl and live happily ever after.

Basically, Balthazar tells Dave that they need to get the Grimhold before Horvath does. And Dave was the last one they saw have it. It holds all those people who wish to free Morgana [Morganians]. And Horvath wants for free them and Morgana. Not cool people, not cool... Balthazar then confronts Dave about why he kept the ring. -insert flying furniture here- If Dave helps get the Grimhold, he'll be done with all this magic stuff. Using weather things, Balthazar and Dave find the approximate location of the Grimhold.

Balthazar picks up his kick ass ride and they begin with sorcery 101. Oh and magic isn't really magic or whatever. Basically, sorcerers can use all of their brain, as oppose to just 10% of it like the rest of us nomads. That's how they can do the shit they do. And how physics comes so naturally to Dave. And here are the steps for creating fire:
1. Clear your mind
2. See the molecules
3. Make them shake
BAM! Fire!

We find out via Horvath that the Grimhold was taken by a little Chinese lady. And everyone heads off to Chinatown... Unfortunately, Balthazar and Dave are a little late and Horvath has already freed one of the Morganians, Sun Lok some half naked guy. And we have a battle ensuing in Chinatown which includes a kick ass dragon [it's all sorts of freaky and complicated to how it came to be] and lots of fire and funfetti falling. Dave defeats the dragon and the cops show up as Sun Lok is defeated [Go team magical stuff!]. With some clever disguises, they leave with the Grimhold and Dave is left with an ultimate: give back the dragon ring or continue on. And he decides to go on.

Going to Dave's secret batcave lab, Balthazar will train Dave as his apprentice. Balthazar gives Dave the Incantus which is basically a big book of magic, history and lessons and stuff. Balthazar makes an awesome glowing, fiery circle, which is called the Merlin circle. Basically, it's where Dave will learn stuff and if he goes in, he can't go back. And we go into a little informational meeting. Dave needs the ring to do the magic and there is something about old man shoes.

We switch to Horvath for a moment who is trying to recruit a newbie to be on his side. And there is one but we don't get to see him or her yet.

Back to training... Which is kind of epic fail at this point. Dave needs to make and control a plasma ball... It seems if he has one, he doesn't have the other. Not good... Harry Potter and occlumency

And we go back to Horvath who is meeting his new recruit who is flamboyant celebrity magician David Blaine Drake Stone or something. He looks weird.

We wander back to Dave and Balthazar where training seems to be going better. Dave seems to have kind of gotten the hang of it. They go out and get something to eat and proceed to sit on a park bench... Which is relevant because it's in sight of Becky's work! And she happens to be leaving at that moment! Balthazar basically tells Dave he's a moron and don't go after her. It's not safe blah blah blah... Dave runs after her anyway in order to chat her up and kind of tells her he is a stalker of the non-threatening kind.

We follow Dave and Becky into the subway station where they chat... Until Becky is robbed by some scary man! Dave goes to be the hero and knocks the guy out with a flaming trashcan. Yes, a flaming trashcan. And he brings Becky back her stuff and just before her train-thingy leaves, they schedule to meet the next day...

And Balthazar pops up and says "Love is a distraction." Which is true... At least in this case.

More Horvath! He has found the perfect spot for the resurrection or whatever of Morgana. Non-coolio.

Back to training! Which is quickly interrupted by Becky showing up. Balthazar is introduced as Dave's uncle and he wanders off so they can have some alone time. With his time, Balthazar wanders to a secret hiding place and collects some things, including a pretty necklace.... For Veronica per chance?

While Balthazar is away, Dave and Becky will play! But not really. Dave wants to show Becky something... And asks her to come into his cage... kind of awkward and scary much? And she does. And Dave turns on his lightning/thunder machine thingy. And it's making music! And the song we heard earlier in the movie ["Secrets" by OneRepublic] is playing via the bolts! Cool beans! And Dave and Becky schedule a date! Exciting stuff.

Awkwardly, we see Dave in the bathroom where he is confronted by celebrity magician David Blaine Drake Stone and Horvath. Thankfully, Balthazar saves the day again [Damn, Nicholas Cage is good but that could be because he's an executive producer of the movie] but not before Dave learns that he is the prime Merlinian and that there are people in the Russian dolls. Oh, and Horvath is thrown in a mirror. He then makes Balthazar confess all the story. Basically, Dave is suppose to save the world, which is a lot for someone his age. But he can't go back now, the Merlin circle and all the jazz.

After escaping the mirror, Horvath and celebrity magician David Blaine Drake Stone go to get Dave's information from the school. And they find out about his unauthorized lab space... Which, you'd figure wouldn't be in the database of the school if it was unauthorized, right? And it was earlier said that the space was known only to Dave and his professor... Who I can't imagine would have put that information in himself... What a muddled mess.

And there is more training for Dave. Basically, when the prime Merlinian can do magic with out the ring, he'll be able to defeat Morgana... But Beck is coming soon and Dave needs to clean! Which leads into the epic scene from Fantasia which this whole movie is based around. The scene of the Sorcerer's Apprentice! Dave wanders off a bit to shower and whatnot while the mops and brooms and stuff start cleaning. And naturally, everything becomes chaos for him.

Unfortunately, he can't stop them and Becky arrives on time! He sends her away in order to try and fix the bigger mess he has created. Right before he is electrocuted, Balthazar saves him once again. Master and apprentice fight with the apprentice deciding to give up.

Dave wanders the streets a bit and wanders past a cafe where Becky is chatting some friends. She sees him leave and decides to follow him up to the top of a building. Just as Dave is about to possibly throw the ring, Becky comes up and distracts him. They chat and reminisce for a bit.

We go back to the bat cave lab where Dave tells Balthazar they need to talk... But it's not Dave! No, it's celebrity magician David Blaine Drake Stone! Horvath and his sidekick get the Grimhold... And we learn that basically... Horvath was jealous of Balthazar because he got the girl. And just as Horvath is about to stab Balthazar with knives, Dave saves the day! For once! It's a miracle!

And here starts a car chase. And apparently, they can change their cars with the magics. Pretty cool, especially when the cars turn into sweet looking automobiles. There is a pretty cool mirror scene done here but it would be a same to just put it in words.

Eventually, Horvath and sidekick almost crush the heroes of the story but don't finish. The bad guys get away. Balthazar explains back in the lab about Veronica, their friendship and love. And we have more training to do!

On to Horvath, he needs to let out Abigail Williams [think Salem witch trials]. But to do so, he needs more power, which means he steals it from celebrity magician David Blaine Drake Stone! The next thing we see is a little girl trying to make a request to Becky at the radio station... And it's really Abigail! Ooooo!

With a mini-Balthazar/Dave interlude, we go back to Horvath who takes Abigail's powers to release Morgana/Veronica. But back to our heroes who have found Horvath's hideaway. They separate to find the Grimhold. Balthazar gets trapped in rug, which is kind of like quick sand. We get glimpses of his escape in between the other stuff. David finds the Grimhold and gets his first glimpse of Morgana and Veronica. But Horvath has other plans! He has Becky and unless Dave gives him the ring and the Grimhold, bad things will go down! And Dave gives them to Horvath, who heads off to his location for releasing Morgana.

Balthazar finally makes it to Dave and Becky. He must save the day again but without Dave's help. Cause Dave doesn't have the preeeciousssss ring. So he wanders off on the magical steel owl.

And Dave explains everything to Becky. And she wants to help! So Dave calls his bff/roommate and makes up a plan. Something about pimping out Balthazar's ride...

Horvath releases Morgana [who is in Veronica's body] and she uses the satellites to do... Something with raising the dead.

Dave sees these crazy lights going from satellite to satellite and figures it out... But he needs to get to Horvath... So he asks Becky to go to the top of one of the satellite towers and disrupt the circle... Problem, deathly afraid of heights... But she does it.

Balthazar distracts Horvath as much as he can in order to get the Grimhold. Dave comes to the rescue and helps Balthazar with the pimped car. At the same time, Becky manages to break the circle of resurrection. Which kind of makes Morgana/Veronica pass out. Balthazar takes Morgana into his own body and tries to get them to put him in the Grimhold. But Morgana escapes his body and a fight ensues [Veronica woke up at some point as does Balthazar]. Just as Morgana sends some fire David has learned to do magic without the ring! The Prime Merlinian exists! Using the special effects stuff he did in his lab, Dave gets rid of Morgana  [Dragonball Z style].

However, in the wake of success, it appears that Balthazar has died. But Dave comes up with a plan. He uses his plasma balls to try and resurrect his master. And it works! Hurray! And Balthazar and Veronica are united after lots of time [1000 years or so]. And Becky arrives at the scene! Happy ending! And by the way, Becky checked off girlfriend in the note at the beginning of the movie.



WAIT! As seems to become popular with movies today, there is a little scene after the credits... With Horvath getting his hat?! Can you smell the sequel...

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So overall... It was an ok movie... Honestly, I probably won't bother ever watching it again and my opinion of Jay Baruchel really hasn't changed at all. I'm sure it's nice for a family with somewhat young children [maybe 7-10 years old]. The acting was pretty good but the script left a bit to be desired, I think. Oh, and there was the random friend/roommate who was shown in a total of maybe a minute of the overall movie. They could have easily just left him out of it or given him more to do. Again, probably fun for the family but not really me.

Also, kind of wondering if Nicholas Cage will ever be able to move away from Disney movies. Seems to be all that he's doing now-a-days. Even now, I'm trying to think of a movie he has done recently that isn't Disney. I'm coming up blank. But then again, I don't really keep up with movies he's done or look specifically for stuff he has done.

If there is a sequel to this movie, I'll probably wait to rent it. If that.

Bonus Features:
I'm a bonus features lover, if I haven't said that before... Well, I'm saying it now.

With the DVD version, there are really only 2 worth while special features: Making of the movie and a deleted scene. And even those are kind of disappointing. While some of the making of the movie was cool [AKA learning about the special effects], it was way too long. I just sat through this movie and I don't want to sit through a bonus feature that is about half as long as the movie.